So I've decided that if everything else falls through, I'm going to be a professional ocarinist.
I got an ocarina (a kind of funny little wind instrument that's apparently been around for thousands of years) this week at Pike Place Market in Seattle, and I'm pretty excited about it so far. It's small, it has four holes, it's in the key of F#, and it can play a chromatic scale over a range of one octave. Oh, it's also high-pitched and loud, which means that Jeanette groans every time it makes an appearance.
But I'm not discouraged. So far I've been able to fake my way through "Amazing Grace," "My Song is Love Unknown," "Joy to the World," "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel," and a barely recognizable rendition of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
With that kind of encouraging success, I probably won't lose track of my ocarina for at least another week or two.